This weekend, my Grove is celebrating Imbolc, the first of the spring rituals. I have been debating on and off for weeks whether or not I wished to attend. I thought I did not fit in, but the leader of our Grove effectively eased my anxieties. I had made some assumptions that had turned out not to be true. I simply have always felt like I was outside of the box when it comes to groups of people. This happened in high school and in college. I thought some people were my friends, when they actually did not care about me at all. Finding a niche that I am comfortable in can be challenging. I do consider myself a member of the Pagan community, but well, that is an enormous umbrella term for what a lot of us practice. Each religious or spiritual path (they can be combined or separate) is unique to the individual. No one person worships in the same way.
So where does this leave me for Imbolc? Scattered and rushed! I was planning to draw a picture of Brighid, but I started too late and I doubt I could finish it before Saturday. I mean I could rush it, but I would rather put all my effort into it instead of giving something half-assed. I was intending to give a ring my ex-boyfriend had bought for me, as it is Celtic and Irish, and well, it lives in a sad state of not being used. I do not think of it as garbage by any means. If so I would certainly throw it away instead of holding on to it. I have no romantic feelings for the person who gave it to me. So it is not toxic with negative energy. The small red stone in it reminds me of Brighid, but it still needs to work done to it, so I will give it as an offering, maybe to the river or on a trail (weather permitting) or maybe I will hold on to it until spring so I can leave it in my favorite part of the walking trail. Anyway, I am going to give a small candle.
At some point I would like to light a candle in every room of the house. To signify Spring and welcoming it back into our lives. We still have a ways to go before March is here, I am tired of wintry gray skies and excessive snow accumulation. But even so…watching the snow drift down is so hypnotic and beautiful. But I prefer a rise in temperature. It has been such a frigid winter. But the promise of spring is evident for those who persevere. We are in this together. We need each others support, insight and humor.